Monthly Archives: October 2010

Ready Set … Oops.


“You can make mistakes and not be a failure if you give it your full effort. Effort includes both preparation and execution. You are never a failure if you gave it your all, unless you blame others for your mistakes. When you place blame, you’re making excuses; when you’re making excuses, you can’t evaluate yourself; and without self-evaluation, failure is inevitable.”

I read this quote, and didn’t really know what to think.

As i approach my last year of high school, the stress comes down to every test i take, every mark i get, everything i add up on my resume, and everything that appears on my transcript. Overwhelming. I don’t know how people do it, i don’t know how they did it. I just know, i must do it.

I look at my piles of homework, and wish with all my heart, that something will just swoosh over them for them to be done. Over with. To see that beautiful A in a circle on my paper.


Reality, nope. Why isn’t it as easy as my past 14 years of school have been? The quote above says you make mistakes. We all make mistakes no…but do i have time? Its been two months, and in a short time i will begin applying to university, i have no time for mistakes.


I am working hard, and i feel like shouting that out to the world. I’m making and discovering new ways to study, new ways to get my marks up high, and get that 90 avg. It seems so close, yet so so far to grasp.

Sometimes we want to cry, but then again, in grade 12 you’ve got no other option then to study.


Chit Chat


Oh lets have a little chit chat:

“OMG. Her hair, totally not nice, who the heck does she think she is”

“Did you seeee that! She totally gave me a dirty look”

“I’m telling you, she hates me, she hates me!”

Uhh, what is up with girls these days. All they have time to do is talk, talk, gossip, spread rumors and talk! Why?

Insecurity, i believe, is the reason to all of this. To boost their ego, they must step on a couple to get up there. They themselves must hurt others.

Gossiping, its like this nasty contagious diesase. I talk to myself first and foremost, cuz i am not perfect, yepp, i’m human, we all fall into mistakes. I catch myself sometimes lost in a convo about how that person totally gave me a dirty look, or how she is dressed today is so shallow. But it happens.

What ticks me off, is when its a constant blabber. Something you find people feed off of, they MUST talk about others at any time of the day, it just is part of their daily lives.

Sometimes i wish i could hang out with guys, just the fact that during lunch at shcool they play football not have to sit with girls who have to talk about each other.

SIGH. The thing is, i don’t want to be rude to some friends, so i just go off to study, but at times i just feel soo sorry for people who cannot control their tounges, it just makes me sad that they cannot carry a normal conversation without mentioning someone else in a negative manner. Its something i feel like we all neeeed to work on, and if someone advices you a nice advice saying ‘tone it down’ don’t get mad, they just love you.

Sometimes i just wanna yell out ‘YOU ARE EATING SOMEONE ELSE’S FLESH!!” sighh may Allah guide us all.

Not so Great, afterall.



I just finished a book- The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzegerald.


It was quite dry for a chapter, but as the novel ended it really really played with my emotions.

The novel basically, i don’t want to ruin it, but there is this man who spends most of his life- Gatsby- building up a reputation, to regain the love of a girl from his teenage life, who has now moved on and married, and has a child. He spends his life, working and became this holified man in the city. Huge house, huge parties that hundreds of people would come to.

But no one ever knew who he was.

He was mysterious, had this wishy washy past, know no was to sure about, so they just gossiped and made up most of it.

The narrartor of the novel though- Nick- gets to really know Gatsby. Nick though, spends so much time with Gatsby, and becomes one of his closest friends.

Anyways, my point of this post, is not to spoil the book- but to show the worth of this great ‘Gatsby’ man in the end. Everyone talked about him, everyone wanted to be at his party, everyone knew ‘about’ this man.

In the end, he dies. Its a horrible death.

The death part shocks you yes, but its not about his death, and the nasty way he died, it is his funeral that got me thinking.

Nick, as a loyal friend, calls people, goes around town, and all over NY to see if anyone would come to the funeral. People reject. People care less. People who literally flooded his house during the parities, didn’t even dare come near his house, and no one showed up.

What was really scary though, the one man that help mold Gatsby into getting all the money he had, and getting the future he had said:

“Let us learn to show our friendship for a man when he is alive and not after he is dead, after that my own rule is to let everything alone.”


It struck me straight in the heart! Is that real friendship? To be there when your alive then — nothing?

A friend cannot be considered a friend until he is tested in 3 occasions: in time of need, behind your back, and after your death (Ali bin Abi Talib)

That was the first thing i thought of. Would i want my friend, my loyal friend who helped me through ups and downs, betray me and not come to my funeral. Of course not, that isn’t true friendship.

Even though this novel wasn’t a muslim novel or anything of that sort, you honestly felt saddness for the character, that only his father showed up to the funeral. The father, Nick, and the priest. This man was supposedly ‘good’ he held all these amazing parties, he worked hard for his fortune, but did it really affect anyone else? Did he really have an influence on others to allow them to travel miles to come to his funerals.

You read about ibn Hanbal, and great sahabah, who thousands and thousands walked and showed up at their funerals.. Where angels, even came and helped carry their tomb.

This novel brought me to tears, got me thinking, how many people do i want at my funeral? Will it be real, or will it be because by chance they were at the mosque that afternoon?

May Allah grant us husn al khatimah, and allow many people to come out and make duaa’ for us on the days of our death. Ameen.

Your thoughts?